Happy Father’s Day everyone! I hope you were able to enjoy the day with your families.

The Mass readings for Father’s Day were perfect. In the first reading, David gets a message from God through the prophet Nathan for taking Bathsheba as his own and then killing her husband Uriah the Hittite. What does he get? Forgiven. In Luke’s gospel, Jesus is having dinner with a Pharisee when a sinful woman comes in, interrupts the party, anoints Jesus, kisses his feet, cries and dry’s his feet with her hair. What does she get? Forgiven.

Who knows more about how to forgive than a father? After all, our Father in heaven is the greatest forgiver of all. But how many of us have someone in our lives who we haven’t forgiven or won’t forgive? We attend church, do all the right things, but don’t forgive someone who hurt us. Yet we stand before a forgiving God unwilling to forgive. And us Catholics, who believe that the Real Presence of Jesus Christ is manifested in our bread and wine every Sunday, stand before him, receive him in our bodies and refuse to forgive someone. And then we expect forgiveness for ourselves. “Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.” Those were Jesus’ words, a directive from him that we repeat often but don’t realize what we’re saying.

In essence, Jesus is telling us to first forgive who we need to forgive, then come ask for forgiveness. This is a hard teaching I know. It’s one that I struggle with often. But I must not stand before the Lord and expect a gift from him that I’m not willing to give to others. In fact it’s already been freely given to me. I just need to pass it on.

In today’s Mass, the gospel reading was Luke 7:11-17. It’s the story of the widow in Nain whose son had died. Jesus was moved with pity and told her, “Do not weep.” Then he stepped forward, touched the coffin and said, “Young man, I tell you, arise!” And so he did. Then Jesus gave him to his mother. The gospel says that “fear seized them all.”

For those of us that know the loss of a loved one, we know that fear would absolutely seize us. But so would Joy. We don’t hear about the mother and her son and how their life went on from there. I can imagine the celebrations! A sad funeral turned into a joyous celebration of life! Probably many days of celebrating, and hopefully praising God. Do you think they went back to find Jesus to thank him? Did they follow him and become his disciples? I would like to think so and hope that I would do the same.

We live in a different kind of world today. When death comes close to us we do weep, and sometimes bitterly. Sometimes not at all. But we do deal with it at some point in some way in our life. We don’t have Jesus or the prophets to bring our loved ones back. At least not in the way they did two thousand years ago. But we do have something. We have the words of Jesus. In fact, we have the Incarnate Word, Jesus alive in the pages that tell the story of his life! And even though ancient, they speak to us in many different ways, at different times and differently each time. Read that story and then think quietly and hear Jesus speaking to you. “Do not weep! Arise! Carry on!” And as he gave the man back to his mother, he will give you back to your life.

Happy Holy Week!

As I head off to Chicago for my son’s graduation from boot camp, I had to write a quick note about this wonderful spiritual week. In a recent session I had with my spiritual director I talked about being away for Holy Week. I didn’t realize how important it was for me to celebrate these days. I was really upset about having to be away and not being able to celebrate with my parish family. She suggested that I take the daily Gospel readings and put myself into the stories and to become a friend of Jesus and accompany him through all his struggles this week. Let him bless the bread at table, let him wash my feet, be with him in the garden, stand by him when he’s arrested and accompany him to court. Walk with him on the road to Golgotha and help him carry that cross. Just stay close to him and be with him through it all.

She said in a way I am doing that by going away. All I’m giving up to be with my son. To enjoy him and enjoy his company and be totally there. It’s a sacrifice that’s not even close to our Lord’s sacrifice. At the same time, be with Jesus in his struggles as he goes about his day.

With this guidance on my heart, I went to church on Monday night for a spirituality meeting and had the opportunity to spend time with good friends from church as we studied the crucifix in our main worship space. The leader of the night asked us to come close and kneel on the floor for a few moments and adore Christ on the cross. It was dark with two small lights shining on Jesus. One of our music leaders played piano and sang a beautiful song called “When They Crucified My Lord.”

Kneeling there looking up at Christ just overcame me. For a second I was there at Calvary witnessing the last moments of his life. Rain was pouring down and the drops were dripping off his hair. Steam from the rain was rising off his still warm skin but his breath was already gone. His sacrifice was monumental to me as my eyes filled with tears. It was one of the most powerful nights in recent memory that was a great prelude for my week. Even though I won’t be around my home parish, I will take that memory with me as I travel. I will also take this picture with me that I took later that night.

What about you? Are you going to let this week pass by just like every other week? I challenge you to do something different and pick someone in this story and become that person for the next four days. If there’s no one you can relate to, insert yourself into the scene and accompany Jesus on this road no matter where you are or what you’re going through. You’re relationship with him will flourish as a result and he will be with you like never before.

God Bless you all during this Holy Week and Passover.

On Monday we sent 18 year old Matthew off to Navy Boot Camp in Great Lakes, IL. We had a large gathering on Saturday of family and friends to send him off. It was a great celebration for a great kid.

I wasn’t prepared for the emotions that would rise up in me as a result.  After having dinner with him Monday night and taking him back to the hotel where all the recruits were staying, he was very somber. I knew he was tired but somber I wasn’t expecting. We texted that night a final good night and then I didn’t hear from him until he landed in Chicago about 6:30 p.m. on Tuesday. The text read, “Just landed in Chicago.” Four hours later he called. “I only have two minutes. I can write whenever I want which I will do. But I can’t call you for another 3 weeks. I have to go.” “Ok, goodbye. I love you son.” “Love you too.” Click.

So final. So cold. It was not the son I knew on the other end of that phone. For almost a year now he’s been excited to go into the Navy. When all his friends started college in August and September, he didn’t have much to do. He picked up more hours at his job at a local restaurant and got involved with the recruiting office activities. In a short while they put him in charge over a group of recruits and then in charge of all 25 of the recruits. He was excited and so was I. His true leadership shining through made me proud. But on the phone he did not sound himself.

I can’t help thinking about what it must be like for him. What bothers me the most is not being able to communicate with him. If it was just text messages I would be fine. But nothing. I’m sure I’ll get letters but they don’t know his address yet so we can’t write. I think about how out of his element he must be and I have no idea how he’s handling all that. And I can’t be there to encourage him. I will once I can write some letters but it stinks not being able to help him through this. All I can do is pray and for now that’s going to have to be enough. And it’s probably enough anyway if I can just get myself out of the way. I mostly pray that his experience doesn’t alter his spirit and that he has peace about his decision.

In a way, I’m grieving again. I’m grieving the temporary absence of my son whose light shines through all of us. I’m missing his love of nature, his love of animals and the outdoors, his fun spirit, and just having him around. And mostly, I’m grieving that his mom wasn’t here to send him off. I know she’s so proud.

The next morning, Tuesday, my 7 a.m.  Men’s Group prayed the Morning Prayer from Magnificat magazine. The Psalm for the morning was Psalm 13:

How long, O Lord, will you forget me? 

How long will you hide your face?

How long must I bear grief in my soul,

This sorrow in my heart day and night?

How long shall my enemy prevail?

Look at me, answer me, Lord my God!

Give light to my eyes lest I fall asleep in death,

Lest my enemy say:” I have overcome him”:

Lest my foes rejoice to see my fall.

As for me, I trust in your merciful love.

Let my heart rejoice in your saving help:

Let me sing to the Lord for his goodness to me,

Singing psalms to the name of the Lord, the Most High.

God always gives me comfort when I need it! This psalm was handpicked for me. It was exactly what I needed at exactly the right time! How does he do that? I woke up that morning and didn’t want to go to the meeting. But I went and he had this psalm ready for my heart and he had my friends there ready to support me. I also know that if he answered my prayer, he’s going to answer the prayers that I’ve been praying for Matthew and the prayers that Matthew is praying about his decision and situation. And that gives me tremendous peace.

Lord God, thank you so much for the gift of your grace in my life and in the lives of those I pray for. And thank you for once again bringing me through your Faith Boot Camp. Amen.